Your breastfeeding journey - my poetry

Perhaps you imagined the beginning to be completely different.

You hold your baby in your arms, lay it on your chest and somewhere inside you think:

Now. Now it begins.

Completely natural. Completely self-evident. You and your baby.

But sometimes life writes the first pages differently.

The birth was difficult. You may have been separated. There were appointments, weights, milliliters, clocks, and plans.

"We need to supplement their feeding."

"Her milk hasn't arrived yet."

"Pump some air."

"Dock every three hours."

And you did what you were told.

Of course you do.

You are a mother. You want your baby to be fed. To be happy.

And at some point you're sitting there, with your pump next to you, your baby in your arms and that little doubt in your heart:

Why doesn't it work for me?

But maybe you weren't the problem.

Perhaps the beginning was simply difficult.

Because breastfeeding sometimes requires no more willpower.

But time. Closeness. Peace. Trust. And someone who really pays attention.

Someone who not only asks how many milliliters your baby drank, but also:

How are you doing?

And then they come.

The voices from outside.

"It worked perfectly for me."

"It didn't work for me at all."

"The child won't get enough to eat."

"Just give him a bottle."

"You're making yourself way too crazy."

"Well, I would do it differently."

And suddenly there's so much opinion on a story that nobody asked for.

But it's your story.

Your breast. Your baby. Your journey.

You're breastfeeding – someone thinks it's taking too long.

You're not breastfeeding – someone asks why you didn't fight.

You hand out a bottle – someone knows how you could have done it better.

You're pumping iron – someone explains to you why that's way too strenuous.

And no matter what you do:

Someone knows better.

Even if you could walk on water, someone would probably still shout:

"Great. You're still too stupid to swim."

So please, dear Mom:

Don't let every voice become your own.

You don't have to justify yourself.

You don't have to listen to every opinion.

And you certainly don't have to believe every opinion.

If you want to breastfeed, then I wish you people who will support you in this.

People who look at you and say:

"You can do it."

Not:

"You need to."

Yes, I believe in the power of breastfeeding.

To that special closeness. To the warmth of a small body against your chest. To that moment when your baby nurses and for a fleeting moment the whole world becomes completely silent.

But I also believe that a mother is more than the way her baby is fed.

A bottle doesn't diminish their love.

A difficult start to breastfeeding does not make her a worse mother.

And supplemental feeding is not a failure.

You took care of your baby.

Perhaps you made decisions when you were tired. When you were afraid. When you didn't even know what you really wanted.

You did what you thought was right at that moment.

You didn't mess it up.

Perhaps she simply had a difficult start.

And perhaps your story is far from over.

Maybe we can find a way back.

Perhaps things will change if someone finally listens.

Perhaps the breastfeeding, which was so difficult at the beginning, will one day become something very easy.

Maybe you're exclusively breastfeeding. Maybe partially. Maybe differently than you imagined.

And perhaps your path will eventually lead you away from the breast.

Even then, you are not a failed breastfeeding mother.

You're simply a mom who has followed her own path.

With her baby. With her heart. With everything that was.

And when you come to me, I don't want to tell you how to do it.

I want to watch it with you.

What do you need? What does your baby need? What is possible? What feels right for you both?

And perhaps you'll find more than just a way to breastfeed.

Perhaps you'll rediscover something much more important:

Trust.

Inside you.

Into your body.

Into your baby.

And into your very own story.

Because your breastfeeding journey doesn't have to be perfect.

She can simply be yours. ❤️

Diana breastfeeding advice Diana Stabl · IBCLC